How love works – The secrets of the UK's workplace romances

How many of us are up for dating a colleague? What happens when passion mixes with paperwork? Do we keep it a secret or circulate a memo? And which jobs offer the best chance of a date? We surveyed more than 5,000 people to reveal the secrets of the UK’s work romances…

LoseCTRL
Adobemine
Firefoxylady
Outlookme up
Findme
Wordup
Emailme
Skypeme
CallHR
LoseCTRL
Adobemine
Firefoxylady
Outlookme up
Findme
Outlookme up
LoseCTRL
Adobemine
Firefoxylady
Outlookme up
Findme
Wordup
Emailme
Skypeme
CallHR
LoseCTRL
Adobemine
Firefoxylady
Outlookme up
Findme
Wordup
Emailme
Skypeme
CallHR
LoseCTRL
Adobemine
Firefoxylady
Outlookme up
Findme
Wordup
Emailme
Skypeme
CallHR
LoseCTRL
Adobemine
Firefoxylady
Outlookme up
Findme
Wordup
Emailme
Skypeme
CallHR

We discovered that you’re more likely to meet your partner at work than in a bar, online or even through friends.

Here’s how we meet our partners:

22%Work
18%Friends
13%Online dating
10%Night out
8%Social event
7%School or uni
6%Family
3%Shared hobby
2%Holiday
11%Other

Next section

66%
34%
50%
80%
38%
76%
3%
60%
51%
59%
71%
59%
65%
31%
25%
17%
11%
30%
22%
20%
12%
42%
25%
26%
20%
35%
14%
13%
13%
16%
44%
37%
15%

But how easy is it to work with the one you love? Here’s what 5,795 UK workers had to say about romance in the workplace.

It turns out 2 in 3 UK workers are up for dating a colleague.

Leaving 1 in 3 workers who would never date someone at work.

The main reason these cautious folks wouldn’t date a colleague? They just don’t think romance and work mix.

If you’re looking for love at work, your best bet is to apply for a job in the leisure industry. You’ll find most people are open to dating a colleague.

Best to avoid manufacturing, though – your co-workers are likely to be less enthusiastic.

Don’t worry if this is all news to you.

It seems we don't like discussing our workplace romances. Dating colleagues tend to keep their relationship hush-hush.

Although a noble few dating colleagues remain ever the professionals and go straight to HR.

But what is it really like to date someone you work with?

Colleague couples admitted feeling the need to act more professionally.

Colleague couples also confirmed that gossip in the workplace added pressure to the relationship.

And we found that those living in London were even more likely to feel the pressure of gossip.

But there’s good news, too. If you’re dating a colleague, the chances are your career progression won't come into question.

You won't find it any more difficult to plan holidays.

And you'll still get that precious 'me time'.

So what's the worst that can happen when you date a colleague?

1 in 3 feel judged by their co-workers.

1 in 4 experience jealousy.

1 in 6 get made fun of.

And 1 in 10 felt they were discriminated against because of their workplace romance.

Not everyone’s experience will be the same.

If you're a woman dating your manager, your career is more likely to take a hit than a man dating their manager when it comes to...

your promotion opportunities,

your salary and bonus opportunities,

your relationships with colleagues,

and your relationships with managers.

Then there’s the fact that things might not (ahem) work out.

1 in 3 UK workers think breaking up with a colleague would negatively affect workplace dynamics.

But only 1 in 7 UK workers would quit their job because of it.

A risk that seems to gradually reduce the further north you live.

These northerners would quit their job if the relationship ended.

Fewer than the southerners who would quit their job if the relationship ended.

There are plenty of reasons why a relationship at work might not last.

On the relationships that ended, many said that working together killed the romance.

Others found their relationship got in the way of work – and chose the latter.

But as with any relationship, sometimes it's just not meant to be.

Here are some of the many different reasons you gave for calling it quits with a work mate.

  • "Lost interest"
  • "People trying to cause trouble with lies"
  • "She was married to a colleague"
  • "He got a new one"
  • "Drifted apart"
  • "Had to move to a different country"
  • "Found out he was married"
  • "She found someone else"
  • "Disconnect of ambition"

totaljobs

Survey data
Totaljobs research of 5,795 UK workers in Febuary 2018.